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Who defines and decides my failures?


Last week we talked about failure.

We said that failure is a valuable opportunity that fuels progress.  

So how do I define failure?

When I try to reach beyond my current "personal best," and I don't reach that goal... is that a failure?

When I try to practice a new "healthy habit," but I eat the muffin instead of the orange... is that a failure?

When I try to solve a problem, and my "first attempt” doesn't work... is that a failure?

Often, if others judge my performance as a failure... I believe them.

the Myth:
Others define and decide my failure and dictate to me what that failure means.

Occasionally, I might not just accept the judgement of others.

Instead, I judge my own performance by comparing it against the performance of others.

Let's say that I'm a new student at college.  I'm struggling.  My fellow students seem to have it all figured out.  They make it look easy.  Compared to them, I feel like a failure.  But am I really failing?

I can't fail at being me.  I am a gift in whatever state that I find myself.

the Model:
I choose to define and decide what "failure" is and how I will use it in my process and progress.

Others may define my failure and success as “either/or.”
(I am either a “failure" or a "success.”)

I can choose to see failure and success as “both and more.”
(I am more than the sum of my “failures and successes.”)

I am “Be-loved” (greatly loved, dear to the heart), regardless of my failure or success. 

the Practice:

Consider an experience or situation that you judge as a “failure” and examine the following:

Where do your definitions of and decisions about failure come from?  (i.e. who are you listening to?)

~ Judgements from others?  (living from  the "outside in")

~ Self judgements based on the judgements from others?  (again, living from the "outside in")

or

~ Choosing the truth and reality from the Beyond within.  (living from "inside out")

My value does not come from the judgements of others but from the Beyond within.  I am a gift, progressing as me in my own unique process.

Remember,
You are not alone.  We are in this Freedom Flow together.

Blessings,
Gene

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